Rumi – Kim Upton

shine brightly like the Sun

black and white photo of a battery operated candle on a kitchen countertop

“If everything around seems dark, look again, you may be the light.
― Rumi

First of all, I’m a delight.
Second, everything I’m about to tell you is true.
Third, this is a pic heavy post.
Lastly – there will be typos. As I’ve said before, this proves that AI wasn’t a part of this post.

This is a photo of a statue located at Bernheim Forest. At the base it says, “Let there be light” in English and Hebrew. A lot of folks don’t realize that the man who helped bring one of the most beautiful places in Kentucky to the world was Jewish. As you walk up to the overlook, there is a plaque that reads: “May light, the symbol of life and truth, illumine the paths of good citizenship and reason, and tolerance and fairness guide our relationship with our fellow men.” While I have quite a few photos of this area, this is one of my favorites. It’s like you gotta go through a bit of wildness to find light – and to really see how it (you/the world/everything) shines you gotta see both sides of life. If you wanna go a little deeper, this is absolutely giving a lot energy that says you are loved, and so are they.

The opening image, the wee candle amidst a see of kitchen counter items, is something Mr. The Mister and I purchased at Walmart over a year ago. On Hanukkah we added the batteries, flipped the switch, and let it be. It also happened to be Christmas – so we thought you know two birds are better than one. Always good to cover your bases. I mean it *was* just Yule, and other Northern Hemisphere celebrations for the return of the Sun, so we were for sure for sure (like for sure) giving all the belief/faith systems some love.

Sort of makes me think of this song by Jamiroquai…
“And I’m thinkin’ what a mess we’re in
Hard to know where to begin
If I could slip the sickly ties that earthly man has made
And now every mother can choose the colour
Of her child, that’s not nature’s way
Well, that’s what they said yesterday
There’s nothin’ left to do but pray
I think it’s time I found a new religion
Whoa, it’s so insane to synthesize another strain
There’s something in these futures that we have to be told”

Here’s where I’m gonna pull one of my world famous shifts, then pivots, because that’s how I do.

Some of you know the origin story of Mom’s Strange Magic – I’ve dabbled in sharing parts of it here and there, so there is no need to share it again. The takeaway I’d like to give you here is that it stems from what I call hillbilly mysticism, of which I would call myself a hillbilly mystic. Before the language police come after me, please know that my life makes me very qualified to use both of those words together. Grew up rural poor, studied faith systems, and believe that we come from the Earth and to Her we will return. Pretty soon you’ll hear more about these things, but today is not that day. All you need to know is that my work can easily be summed up as Mom’s strange magic. Also, I’m absolutely prepared for anyone who wants to tell me that magic is “evil” or sinful because they don’t understand the history of the word. Mom’s unusual theurgy just doesn’t have the same marketing *zing*…but anyway…

You see, my life has been a persistent walk between dichotomies. Or, as the Buddhists might say, the Universe seeks to place me in the Middle Way all the time. Yes…all…the…time. It’s like everything is a shad of grey between light and dark. My Anam Cara is my Shadow – a divine soul friend reminding me that the best way to live is to shine my weird little light for folks all of the time. And again, yes…all…the…time…

For a long time I did that without good boundaries. Let me just say that existing that way will make you lose your mind, forget your soul, and wear down your body. That’s not dramatic word wanderings, y’all – it’s just straight facts. It took me 54 years to figure out how to foster healthy borders around my life, but now that they exist they are metaphorically made of diamonds, titanium, and particles gifted to me from the Universe.

Lately the fam has been talking about how going through the very worst thing you can think of, and making it to the other side, gives you some deep perspective with a healthy dash of being prepared. Or, as the cheesy maxims on line say, “You have survived all of the bad days you’ve experienced so far.” (side note: as a spiritual director and wellness advocate, those kinds of phrases make me skin crawl a little…but you know – that’s a topic for another day)

So back to the returning of the light, the Sun, holy days, and my walk as a hillbilly mystic…

Here in a moment I’m gonna share a poem from my chap book, Blue Is The Color Of My Voice. (link takes you to Amazon, which will make some of you scream in horror, and I get it – really I do – but trying to get a publisher these days doesn’t happen unless you have 40 bajillion followers on all the “social” media platforms) You can get your own copy, and I’ll make a whopping 16 cents! Huzzah!

The above piece of art came with a used book I recently purchase (Living Buddha, Living Christ), and it was marking a page that had a heading that read: “Seeing the way, taking the path.” After a lot of reverse image searching, the only thing I could figure out about this design was that – 1) it was painted onto sycamore bark; 2) it is sometimes seen as a symbol for both the saint, and the goddess, Brigit/Brigid. Well now that’s just a fine how-do-you-do, because She is absolutely one of my faves. Not only that, She is seen as the patroness of healing, song, and art – like come on y’all…that’s some unusual theurgy right there. Years ago when I received a used copy of the Carmina Gadelica and there was one lone piece of dried Shepherd’s Purse – sometimes seen as a “sign” from Brigit that Spring is coming. The readings were 53, 54, and 55 – named Soul peace, The new moon, and Christmas hail.

Those Celtic Christians, akin to the Desert Mother’s and Father’s, knew about hillbilly mysticism. They lived in the spaces between the duality of nature and religion – seeing all of it as one body of the Divine. But this is only a mere light upon the surface of all the stuff in my noggin about such things. That means it is time to share my poem…

While writing this I’ve put a chicken in the crock pot, made some cinnamon rolls, messaged with some folks, talked to my husband, made breakfast for folks, and done a load of laundry. As you have read along you might be thinking, “Wow, this person really just has a lot of wild thoughts they put out into the world.” What’s beautiful about this is that yes…that’s exactly how it is. My life is full of being alive, and after years of trying to get the Greek chorus to stop telling me how to be, I decided that what was important for me was to show up as I am. If you and I were talking over a cup of tea/coffee, you would have my full attention. Over the past however-many-years I’ve had to keep one toe in a world that was not of my choosing…but one that had to be experienced. It’s gonna take me a little bit longer to figure out my way around this space (and online) until something settles. Plus, there are 54 years of stories all waiting their turn to be shared – making my thoughts, words, and ramblings look like that one drawer that we all have in our house.

Now let’s put all these things into my version of a stone soup post…

All of us are particles of light. Oddly, this is something that doesn’t cause a schism in the worlds of science and spirituality. There are a lot of institutions that don’t want you to remember your inner shininess because it benefits them not only financially, but because it gives them numbers for their “causes.” In all the world’s beliefs and faith systems we are gently led to find that divine spark within us – to hear the still small voice that reminds us that we are a node in the web of life. It also tells us that what others think of us is none of our business while holding our hands together in a reminder that all of us are connected. When we share love with others, we share love with ourselves, too. I’ve not met anyone that has all the answers, nor has there been anyone to have all the questions. But if you take a moment to stand between two opposites, beaming like the Sun, it might make your world a little brighter. We only get one shot in this physical plane, with time being an enormous long river – we would all get a little more peace if we just stopped for a hot minute to not make everything about just us. One day we will stuff off this mortal coil, and the edicts of those pillars will no longer have a hold on us. Best any of us can do is just walk our path, as best we can, while not throwing rocks in the steps of others.

Time to make some bread, start another load of laundry, and ponder the return of the Sun’s light here in the Northern Hemisphere…while stopping to say a little prayer for those who are about to enter a time of longer darkness…

Much love,
~ KEU

* 27 days

Ahhh-choooo

“If you desire healing,
let yourself fall ill
let yourself fall ill.”
― Rumi

First of all, I’m a delight.
Second, everything I’m about to tell you is true.
Third, it’s time for my yearly cold/flu/???

When my body is feeling a little more tactile than normal, I apparently like to walk around in the land of nostalgia. The images in this post are from an art journal I created in 2012 when I was teaching classes on…you guess it…art journaling. It was how I blended being a lay therapist/spiritual director, artist, writer, teacher – and well…all of the other things I was doing at that time.

Y’all I was at my peak – and life was doing what life does. I miss that time, and am slowly working my way back after events in my world created a huge chasm. Honestly, I’m gathering the courage to talk about it – or write about it – and right at a pivotal moment in my reverse phase planning, the annual illness came to visit a little early.

“first turn yourself upside down
empty yourself like a cup of wine
then fill to the brim with the essence

a voice is descending
from the heavens
a healer is coming”
– Rumi

So I guess there’s a little more work to be done, and a little more time to hear the voice descending from within.

Much love – y’all stay healthy and safe out there,
~ KEU

* 30 days

Left unattended in the full moon (Advent 2025)

Unicorn in a van saying no time to explain and someone talking to a woman asking if the full moon influences them. The reply is, a little.

“Let the waters settle and you will see the moon and the stars mirrored in your own being.” ― Rumi

“You saw the whole of the moon…” – The Waterboys

Mixed media art with a tarot card (The Moon)

First of all, I’m a delight.
Second, everything I’m about to tell you is true.

My Sun sign is Cancer, ruled by the Moon, emotions, and the sacral chakra (Svadhisthana). If I ain’t feeling it, there is a really high probability that it won’t happen. The only time my intuition isn’t spot on is when I’m not listening to it. This doesn’t mean I’m out here seeing the future for everyone, but that my internal navigation system knows where to take me even if my brain feels we should go another way.

And while all this might make you think, “Oh, yeah…well what am I thinking now,” my answer will always be something like this:
“Oh…my…it is bold of you to think all I do is read minds…”

Once the look of awe diminishes, the next part is where the person will be reminded that we are all intuitive. Full stop, no need to give any deeper explanation – we all have this ability.

(patiently waits for the “but science” folks to ponder this)

Okay, so you don’t have to go down TikTok rabbit holes, or run out to get a deck of oracle cards. Intuition, at its core, is just knowing. You can call it pattern recognition, proprioception, or mystical metaphysics. As you know, we are human animals. This means that we come from the elements around us, formed into a mammalian entity, and then sent off into the world through a door that will only open for us again when it is our time to leave this realm.

Have you ever watched a storm roll in while sitting in a forest? The critters use their (*gasp*) knowing to understand the changes in pressure and humidity. Also, they hear the sounds of nature off in the distance saying, “Hey…y’all, it’s about to storm,” so they find shelter. Or, if you are a robin, that means it’s time to get the worms rising to the surface.

But Kim, you’re thinking, we can read each other’s minds…

That is not what I’m talking about – that’s being psychic, not intuition. There’s a huge difference in the two. And, just for the record, you can be intuitive and not be psychic – because we are all intuitive.

Before you spend your hard earned dollars on some social media influencer’s program, let me give you the details on how to keep track of your intuition. Have I taught this in the past? Yes. Am I going to teach it again? Who knows…but for now let me give you the contents of the entire class in a few bullet points.

When you have a “feeling” about something, write it down with the time, date, and what was going on around you.
If that thing happens, put another note next to what you wrote with the time, date, and what was going on around you.
If that thing doesn’t happen, put another note next to what you wrote with the time, date, and what was going on around you.

Do this for as long as feels right, but honestly I’d do it for a few weeks to have significant data.

Here’s an example: “On 1/17/19 I had a feeling to take the backroads home after being out all day. Nothing was going on, and getting stuck in traffic wasn’t a huge worry. Just got that ‘feeling’ to take another way.” Sure enough, there was a wreck that would have delayed me much longer than a traffic jam. I go back to my little note and write: “Major accident on usual way home (1/17/19). Took back roads and had a great talk with the passenger riding with me.”

The amount of times a client has asked me if it’s weird to have experiences like the one above happened so many times that I made a printout for them to use. Before closing for the day, let me say a few words…

Intuition does not go against and Divine Being (of your choosing) or faith system. Intuition is not at odds with the art of science – because good gods how do you think we have the things we do now? Intuition is helpful, not evil, bad, wrong, or what have you. Intuition is often deeply personal, and doesn’t always apply to others in your life. (plus, that would need to be a whole other post)

A dear friend of mine gave me this mantra/prayer many years ago, and it’s something that I say when the Moon is very full, and again when it is very New – “Let the Light shine. Let All be revealed.” Feel free to use this in your own daily practice, or when you think about it. I find that it is helpful when my brain is full of squirrels, cobwebs, or both. May this Full Moon in Gemini shine its light upon you, revealing what it is you most need to know.

Most importantly, listen to your intuition.

Much love,
~ KEU

* 37 days

we are more than drops in the ocean (part 4)

First of all, I’m a delight. Second, “You are not a drop in the ocean. You are the entire ocean in a drop.” ― Rumi

photo of Lake Michigan from the Chicago side.

Not the ocean, but a beautiful image of Lake Michigan from the Chicago side. Further down I’ll post a full image of the painting – please feel free to scroll on down, get a screen capture, and look it up. Interestingly it will somehow loop back to: 1) this post or 2) random archived places where I’ve discussed the painting previously. Welcome to the digital spiral that is the internet.

Today I was chatting with my editing team about how one stays authentic to their creative self while also trying to keep one’s toes in the water of content creation. And, yes, I talk about this quite a bit because I’m really trying to understand this shift to “fast food” artistry that is happening on various platforms. There are a few places that will penalize you for having a post/video that is longer than 7 minutes. However, it’s their server space and rules, so we all must march to the beat of their drum.

Or not.

Just say no to the niche. You are not just a drop in the ocean, as Rumi says, but the entire ocean in one drop. Life contains multitudes. You don’t have to be a “niche” creator. Instead, you can be a hub for all your different interests. Your photography, writing, and videos all come from the same person—you.

This can be a more sustainable and fulfilling path than trying to fit yourself into a box that doesn’t feel right. It allows you to create from a place of genuine passion, and it invites people into a conversation, not just a transaction. And that is what this painting means to me. Not the story of the artist, nor her particular beliefs about parts of history – it’s that she DARED to be herself in a culture that actively pushes us to be otherwise.

Just for the record, this is NOT my artwork. I do not own the rights to this and am only sharing it as part of the story about how it came to be in my family’s possession. Also, I cannot share the name of the artist because the internet has eyes. While some can talk about things that are outlandishly unbelievable and gather millions of followers…talking calmly about how a piece of art inspired me to come back to what I love, sharing my creative self, upsets Al’s Gorithms.

watercolor painting of a unicorn standing on a hill between two trees

Here it is, y’all. Here’s the painting in all its glory. And here’s an image that shows you how it ties to history.

unicorn painting with a magazine called photoplay

Side note, I donated this magazine, and no longer own it. Back copies can be find online.

As I’ve said previously, could my family and I be making this bigger than it is? Yes, absolutely and without question…yes. It’s just, and I’m not sure how to even say this in a different way, there’s just something about all of it that creates intrigues in the brain. Even more after the ruckus it caused online.

In the digital world there’s this push for algorithmic success versus the messiness of human creativity. The prevalence of AI-generated content and bot monitoring is designed to have us churn out work that makes the platform happy. As someone that was in tech years ago (think back in the dinosaur days of dial-up via rotary phones), I fully understand the huge cost of data, servers, and the sheer amount of memory it takes to hold all this. We have to become efficient, but that lacks the unique, sometimes illogical, and deeply personal qualities that make humans and humanity so compelling. The rambling, the detours, and the wild punctuation (as in my case), are all part of our authentic voice, signaling to the reader/viewer that a real, thinking person is at the helm.

And this is the paradox: in a world that craves efficiency, the most valuable creative work might be the messiest. True connection isn’t always instant, but we are pushed to immediately decide if someone is in our camp. Real human interaction isn’t like that, it’s built through vulnerability, shared experiences, and the raw authenticity of trying to get by in the world. To truly connect, we need to slow down and engage with the nuances of what the creative person is sharing with us.

This painting is a reminder that the real treasure isn’t in a viral hashtag, or rising to the top of your niche content, it’s in the shared experience of being human. We make mistakes, and we try hard to understand our environment. Art and creativity, in all forms, gives us a brief moment to connect with something bigger than we can understand. We can tell a story about our world, as I’ve said previously, to help others see that they are not alone.

You might have a ton of thoughts right now, but if I may suggest something, let this be one that sticks with you: just say no to the niche. Be multitudinously notorious. Live in the place where your insecurities dwell. Contradict yourself. If you need someone to stand with you, just let me know — I’ll be there with bells on.

Much love,
~ KEU

Currently listening to: The Tales of KE Upton (Spotify playlist – am working on getting it on YouTube as well)
Currently reading: pondering what to read next…stay tuned

can you afford to be an individual

First of all, I am a delight. Second, “Art enables us to find ourselves and lose ourselves at the same time.” ― Thomas Merton , No Man Is an Island

“To be yourself in a world that is constantly trying to make you something else is the greatest accomplishment.”
― Ralph Waldo Emerson

On August 1st of this year (2025) a great removal started. 23 years of journals, art supplies, clothing, books, knick knacks, and the weight of other people’s opinions.

Something happens when you strip away all the things you thought you should be. Or, rather…all the things you thought would help people understand how you navigate the world. You see there’s a high cost to being authentic. Not the sound bite bull caca online, but the wild-eyed dance of knowing you’ve shenan’ed once…and will absolutely shenan again. It’s more like the gift/curse that comes with seeing everything in shades of grey – the neither/nor liminal walk into the unknown that we call being human.

In order to see what’s going on within yourself, you gotta step away from what I call non-conforming conformists. These are the folks that aren’t like anyone else except each other. You see this often in the repetition of viral posts/videos, where if it works for those folks it will work for you, too. Sometimes it does, but mostly it just puts you in a club of cool kids that enjoy the fruits of being popular. Honestly, I get it – there’s safety in numbers. We are hard wired for community, so it makes sense that we look for spaces to fit into with copycat behaviors.

This is what I was going for in yesterday’s post, until one of the cats decided that it needed some more work.

Sociology has been a great love of mine, but I never took it to the academic level – meaning it wasn’t one of my many possible degree programs in college. Where I finally landed was secondary education, English literature, and comparative religions/religious studies. Side note for ya – my credit hours would give me a doctorate level degree, but I decided to get married and have babies. Or, rather, the Universe decided that for me. By age 27 I’d taken my GPA from a 0.4 to a 4.0 – got the Golden Key stuff and even got an invitation to apply for a Rhodes Scholarship – but as we all know…life had other plans. *(Sadly I didn’t meet all the requirements to fill out the application, but it was nice to be considered.) Oh, and I’m short 12 credit hours from having my undergrad. If being a professional student was an actual thing, I’d be applying right now.

car full of items to be donate with a blow mold of mother Mary with child

Bewilderment
There are many guises for intelligence.
One part of you is gliding in a high windstream,
while your more ordinary notions
take little steps and peck at the ground.

Conventional knowledge is death to our souls,
and it is not really ours. It is laid on.
Yet we keep saying we find “rest” in these “beliefs.”

We must become ignorant of what we have been taught
and be instead bewildered.

Run from what is profitable and comfortable.
Distrust anyone who praises you.
Give your investment money, and the interest
on the capital, to those who are actually destitute.

Forget safety. Live where you fear to live.
Destroy your reputation. Be notorious.
I have tried prudent planning long enough.

From now on, I’ll be mad.
– Rumi

After years of walking around on social media (specifically the one with the big blue F), I started losing my ability to stand upright in my own skin. It happens to the best and strongest of us – so if you’re going through it just know that you’re not alone. It’s tough out there to be who you are.

Thing is, some folks are just born with a different set of colors in their palette. Sometimes it looks like a genetic health issue, bad parenting, socio-economic conditions, or a secret unknown thing. Heck, it could be all of the above, which is like winning the weirdo lottery where all the niches you could fill don’t have a place for you due to that “unknown” aura circling above your head.

One of the reasons I write, create, and generally engage in living life to the fullest, is to show others that it’s safe to be who they are – or who they want to be. While searching for someone to help me understand all the things, very few stepped up, so I learned how to do it myself. *(side note: this also happens for folks who grew up poor, learning how to survive and fix all the things on their own.)

And not just a few things, but literally all the things. When you do that, guess what you start to acquire? If you said 3 car loads worth of stuff, that would be the correct answer.

This is day 13, the luckiest one, of standing exactly where I want to be. As I’ve written previously, it’s a rebirth of sorts – or maybe something akin to what a Phoenix experiences. It’s a little scary, and it takes a lot of energy to walk the talk. My plan is to document all of this through words, images, and videos (yes, videos, please don’t come at me). The end result (fingers crossed) will be a nicely edited book. Heck, let’s just say the sky is the limit here and go for a movie deal.

Because, dear readers…everything I’m about to tell you is true.

Much love,
~ KEU

Currently listening to: A Perfect Circle (album: Thirteenth Step)
Currently reading: (well re-reading) The Cats of Tanglewood Forest by Charles de Lint