Analog(ous) (Advent 2025)

Blue mandala on black background

“The journey is what brings us happiness not the destination.”
― Dan Millman


First of all, I’m a delight.
Second, everything I’m about to tell you is true.

One only has to travel a few posts back to see how my relationship with being online is tenuous, irresolute, and somewhat curmudgeonly. As someone born in the 1970s, I’ve watched technology go from talking wrist watches in Dick Tracy to wearing something similar that I’ve nicknamed Santa Claus (“it sees you when you’re sleeping, it knows when you’re awake…it knows if you’ve been bad or good…”).

When I was 17 my Mom sent me to buy cigarettes, which was not a huge deal…so I’d often buy some for myself and others. Same with beer and alcohol. Sure you were supposed to be 21 to get the intoxicating elixirs such as Boone’s Farm, or cherry vodka, but in reality if the owner knew your parents, and didn’t act fishy, it was pretty easy to get whatever your little teenage heart desired.

Sure, part of that is the benefit of living in a small fairly rural community, but I’ve heard stories from my peers about the same kinds of things. That and drinking from the garden hose, or remembering the ads telling our parents to make sure we were home. We weren’t the first to be called latch-key kids, but our plights made the evening news almost weekly.

In short we were feral – free to just experience life as dangerously as we wanted. I mean our parents literally tried stuffing as many people as they could in a phone booth, or *gasp* driving in cars without seatbelts. It was a great time to be alive.

Also, we didn’t have little devices tracking our every move, sending us deals on the soap we just purchased at the store, or allowing us to see half way around the world. Sure, we had MTV, CNN, and all that, but when we turned off the television it wasn’t tracking our sleep habits.

I’ve shared this before, but I think it needs to be posted once again. That quote in the middle is from me. I was working for WKU’s computer service department, and was there when the university was connected to Internet. Not “The Internet,” just Internet. Even better, I taught others how to use Internet, so we could all access the “…unlimited amount of knowledge out there.”

Later I would work for a local ISP where one of the customers sent quite a huge amount of “herbal supplement” emails out to folks. Or, as we call it now…spam email. It was glorious – the job not the spam – and for a few shot moments it felt like we (all of humanity) had the opportunity to truly be connected to each other. Wars could end, people could learn from each other, the dawning of the age of Aquarius had begun!

Not much after all this joy I read a book called Neuromancer by William Gibson, and started learning all I could about Artificial Intelligence. (those hyperlinks will take you to Wikipedia – which love it or hate it, is a great place for spending hours learning about everything you can)

So y’all know, I could really get super long form here with charts, more funny memes, and a lot of waxing existentially into “ah, those were the days,” but today is not that day. Not because I’m not up for a good yarn or two – mostly because I’ve been really enjoying the analog world these days. Before coming to wrap this post up I spent 10 minutes cracking up at the outdoor bird antics. I mean, you know, how do they have fun if no one is recording it? I kid, but also, I kid not.

In all of these words there a point, and it’s that time is short. It’s not my place to tell others what to do with their minutes each day, nor is it really any of my business. As I walk through some new stages in my life, some new perspectives have been gathered. If I can talk directly to someone instead of accessing them through their social media, that’s what I do. Also, it has been rather enjoyable to take little trips into town for coffee and a visit to the local library. Not everyone needs access to me 24/7 (other than family), nor do I need 24/7 access to everyone else.

It is okay to take time from being online. Sounds wild to say it in an online blog post, but maybe it is something you needed to hear today…especially from someone who was there when “Internet” went from text based to WYSIWYG. Which, honestly, is my admittance of using online social media sites for much longer than I needed. And…well…letting what those sites dictate my sense of well being and happiness.

In conclusion (said in my best high school term paper voice), time is an enormous long river, and I want to be more present in the feeling of the water stream over my feet. While I do have some projects in the works, I’ve made some very doable schedules that make room for watching a stream live instead of a live stream.

With that, I’m off to see what the birds are doing. Thanks for being here – I’m sending you tons of support and good energy.

Much love,
~ KEU

* 35 days

Reclaiming (Advent 2025)

First of all, I’m a delight.
Second, everything I’m about to tell you is true.

Bird feeder with mandala light inside.

“It is important to expect nothing, to take every experience, including the negative ones, as merely steps on the path, and to proceed.” ― Ram Dass

Today is the second day of Advent. While I’m not particularly aligned with any faith system, this time of year has always held a special place in my heart. Maybe it’s the genetics, as my Ancestors would have been settling in for a long winter full of darkness and cold. Or, it could be that I was raised in what might be called a “liberal” Catholic Church. Whatever it is, my non-denominational hillbilly mystical self just loves the thought of spending 4 weeks in contemplation. Although, if you ask my spouse, he would tell you that I’m always pondering something.


Before I get my yarn going, let me take a moment to wish you Rabbit! Rabbit! This is a folk practice that seems to have originated with the British during the early 1900s. This tradition has travelled through other cultures, and has come to reside on the internet where well meaning people want to argue about it. My thought on all of it is this – I’m saying to you, with the utterance of “Rabbit!! Rabbit!!” (and sometimes it’s fun to add an extra Rabbit!! because that’s how the old stories go with things being in threes and all), that it’s my fondest hope that your month is full of grace and ease. With that out of the way, lemme get down to the nitty gritty…

For the past little bit I was stuck in a boot loop, returning to a place where I got stuck. When things like this happen with our technology, we keep turning it on/off again in hopes that this time something magically change. However, when anything just keeps circling round and round, nothing will stop it until it meets an equal, or opposite, force. Again, these are things we know about our physical world(s). When this happens to our emotions or spiritual path, we grasp at straws to find answers. “Why did [insert faith system top boss here] do this to me? What prayers/offerings/etc. do I need to offer to stop suffering like this? Why me? Let me tell everyone on the internet about this…” Okay, that last one was, shall I say…a wee bit snarky – not just to the global culture, but for myself as well. Because, you know, I have – in the past – had a little issue with wanting to tell all y’all about my life as if no one else was going through sh*t.

So…yeah…this loop stuff…

Sometimes humans get bad data from other humans. This info can give you a serious case of WTF, creating a non-stop thought train of, well, WTF. Somehow we have become a culture of I’m right, you’re wrong, with some dogmatic pronouncements that bear no resemblances to the original connection. That’s what happened to me, and it kept me in this never-ending black hole of brain rot for quite some time.

Honestly, I think it was more like the stories of how elephant trainers put the babies on chains so they couldn’t get away. After some time of this the tether would be removed, but the belief of being tied up was already put into long-term memory. They didn’t try to escape because they believe they were still unable to get away. It was a loop of better the enemy you know, than the enemy you don’t know. Well, that and a lot more in the realm of animal/human psychology, but the purposes of this post, let’s just say that sometimes the memories of being held back stick with us for a lot longer than we can ever imagine.

Now I don’t know how this happened, or when, but one day I metaphorically looked down and saw that my feet were no longer in the loop. At first this was pretty terrifying, because I’d become acclimated to this whole smokescreen handed to me by people that had received bad data. Kind of like when you are in a spiral of sadness, and others in that spiral gravitate towards you. That is…until you say, “Hey y’all, look, the sadness is gone…I’m feeling hopeful again.” What you hope to hear is, “Hey, that’s great, how can we support you in this journey,” but what often comes your way is, “Have you seen the news, here’s some angry social media, can any of us ever be happy…” and just – holy moly – a lot of b.s. crashing out at the fact that you found a light at the end of the tunnel.

What all those influencers and self-help authors often leave out is that when you step outside of the expectations of others, it can get very, very lonely. It also challenges your decisions to have better boundaries…going back to that whole “enemy you know” thing. So when you are out there flapping your arms like one of those blow-up creatures in front of a store, the vulnerable parts of yourself start whispering to you with little digs – not-so-great people are better than no people; who do you think you are; don’t you want some validation – like, y’all…no joke, those little negative talkers in our brain can do a number on your mental health.

But then, all of a sudden, after a very long time, you get comfortable with the fact that feeling better in your body, mind, spirit, is not worth stepping back into the circle/loop. When you get a text, message, or email with words clearly laid out to upset you, there is no sting and no reaction. You don’t feel defensive, or not heard, or even worried that you will be alone your whole life with everyone in the world hating you – it’s just like, “Yep, that’s weird, I’m not engaging with that crap anymore.” You become like a grey rock where everything is “that’s great,” or “wow – that must have been wild to experience.”

Now, there are moments when I really do want to step back into that loop because it was my whole life for much longer than I anticipated. Some of it is my doing, some of it is the doings of others, and yet another part is just life. There is absolutely no need to go around pointing out the specks of wood when I’ve got a whole dang forest in my back yard. You know, glass houses and all…


Black and white photo of a rocking chair in a garage.

“Maybe you have to know the darkness before you can appreciate the light.” ― Madeleine L’Engle

Sometime I realized a bit ago was that every time I sat in front of a screen that connected me to a platform that was supposed to connect me to others, was that a little bit of me became performative. Along with that, I would get ranty about how this site, or that site, wasn’t behaving. All you gotta do is wander back a few posts, and you will see me yapping about how unfair it all is that no one was paying attention to me. Y’all, I ain’t above learning, and holy smokes did I learn some things recently. In some weird twist of life lessons, being deep in the darkness of my growth process, these small inner lights started forming…guiding me back to myself. Along the way I found pieces of my dreams lying on the side, so I gathered them into my little magic satchel. Further along tendrils of my creativity had become overgrown, so I nourished them back to fullness. As the light got brighter, there were human forms off in the distance – each one looked a lot like members of my wee little family. As I got closer I found that they had been there all along (and don’t say, “well duh,” because not everyone has supportive family, and for these beautiful humans to have patience with, and for, me…y’all…that’s some for real magic right there) – waiting for me to see the things they already knew.

And that’s when I knew that the loop no longer had me…


For today’s Advent thought, think of something that shines a bit of lit in parts of your life that need it.

Also, here’s the stack of what I’m reading right now. Just started “The Roots of Appalachian Christianity” by Elder John Sparks. Just a few chapters in, and I’ve already filled a few pages in my notebook. If you are interested in the faith systems of rural communities, especially in the Appalachian regions, this is a great read so far.

Much love to all y’all,
~ KEU

* 40 days

walking into webs

First of all, I’m a delight
Second, everything I’m about to tell you is true.

black and white macro photograph of a dandelion

Today it is a New Moon in Scorpio, with the last few days of the Sun also being in Scorpio. And, I mean, who among us wouldn’t want that kind of energy in our lives right now? And if that’s not enough, Mercury is currently in retrograde…just hanging out in Scorpio.

As you’ve most likely noticed, things have been pretty quiet here. After years of having folks say, “Hey, do your work in silence, then share it,” I finally listened. Now I’m over here doing all the things, but not sharing them. This is due to this back and forth in my brain about being on social media. Not a blog or website (or even Patreon), but that little weird place online where no matter how much we try to present as who we are, something happens that makes us feel like we just gotta do something to get attention. This is neither bad nor good, just what is. As strong as I thought my being was, the pull to “go viral” sneaks up and tries to take me for a ride with ego.

So what is a human to do? How do you walk with integrity to your goals and dreams, while also navigating a system that doesn’t seem to work in your favor? Do you keep banging on a door that isn’t going to open, or do you walk away and just do your thing?

These are the very same questions I sat with after taking the whole month of August to learn more about all the places one can promote themselves. If you wanna, please feel free to look at past posts. During my time away I thought about taking them down, or doing some radical changes to my site, but none of that felt like me. Also, I’ve done that so many times in my past – because you know…”I’m different now.” (insert cute eye roll emoji here) No matter how much we grow, change, or even regress, we are always going to be ourselves. There is this HUGE demand to be “authentic” online. However, what can happen – something I’ve experienced personally – is that that proclamation becomes performative. “Look at ME – I’m AUTHENTIC!” Honestly, no matter how grounded you are in your own wellness, the siren song of hanging with the popular kids can sideline even the strongest person.

Before this New Moon rolled around, I took care of some things that were long overdue — such as deactivating my personal Facebook profile. Today I’m pondering just walking away from all the Meta platforms completely, as in no more posting on any of them. While full time content creation might work for a lot of people, but for me it’s like walking into a room of unfolded laundry you put away then unfolds itself again. After working hard to get something up, my brain feels like a scrambled egg, which then gives me this feeling that I’m clearly a dunce for not just internally knowing how to do all of this…especially since I was such an advocate for “Internet.” (see pic below – my maiden name is Ericksen, BTW)

Ah…the beauty of youth… “There’s an unlimited amount of knowledge out there.” Yes, dear, there is, was, and still might be – if we all had listened to those who were trying to teach us media literacy. Even with a background in journalism and education (among other things from my college years), I got sucked into the ease of being myself in a way that got attention for being myself. Sometimes life is just like that, you know – but thankfully we get to live and to learn.

All of this brings me to the point of this post…

If you are here for niche content, lemme just warn you that this might not be the place for you. I’m going to be sharing parts of my work, my daily life, and whatever feels pulled to be shared with y’all. Life is too short to worry about the clicking-tongue Greek chorus of “Internet.” Honestly it held me back for a long time, along with some other things I’ll be discussing along the way, and I’m just very much done with constantly putting my liminal octahedron onto a very thin line. And just a lot of other things that don’t need to be rambled here.

Also, I will be utilizing my Patreon and YouTube more – and while some person out there selling $40 classes on why that’s a bad idea, please know that you will be able to find any videos/Patreon information right here.

So, without further ado…happy opening day to me. I’m back at work and have a lot of things to share with y’all. Big hugs to all of y’all that have been a huge support to me over the past however-long years. Also, a huge thanks to my family for their guidance and love.

Until next time,
KEU

pardon the quiet – just working

First of all, I am a delight. Second…well…just see below. 🙂

photo of a ghost light with the words: "New stuff coming soon" and "site under construction."

Hey y’all! Just a little heads up…

Got my work clothes on ready to, as the folks say, “get ‘er done.” With the help of Barry Bones and my in person assistant, there’s been a lot of stuff going on behind the scenes, so you might see a few bumps and bleeps here. Sadly it is gonna be bonkers to get anything on a certain platform (not this one) to do what I want…and I’m just not going to reinvent the wheel (or start anything new…good Lord none of us want that). That means getting my personal site and Patreon all ready to go.

Again, not about to change all the things, just present the new things in a (hopefully) more cohesive way. Not sure what will stay here, and what will go. After learning all I could about online – I don’t know what to call it…marketing – the best thing is to stick with what makes you happy. So that’s what I’m gonna do.

12 more days to Halloween – anyone else excited?

Much love to all y’all,
KEU

it is never too late

First of all, I’m a delight. Second, give a little bit. (hat tip to Supertramp)


Just so you know, all hair was safe from the flame on the table.

Well, as mentioned, I’ve taken some of this stuff on the road – well to the apps that let you scroll through videos. I’m telling some stories there, too, so feel free to stop in and say hello.

43 days into this consistency thing and I’m learning more about myself than using the internet to get back in the game. Funny how life works, ‘eh?

Another short post as I’m off to make homemade pizza.

Much love,
KEU

40 days

First of all, I’m a delight. Second, “Allt virðist vera breytt” (hat tip to Sigur Ros)

photo of the view from a canopy tree walk 75 feet above the forest floor which is located in an area that reaches around 900 feet above sea level

“When you go out into the woods, and you look at trees, you see all these different trees. And some of them are bent, and some of them are straight, and some of them are evergreens, and some of them are whatever. And you look at the tree and you allow it. You see why it is the way it is. You sort of understand that it didn’t get enough light, and so it turned that way. And you don’t get all emotional about it. You just allow it. You appreciate the tree.

The minute you get near humans, you lose all that. And you are constantly saying ‘You are too this, or I’m too this.’ That judgment mind comes in. And so I practice turning people into trees. Which means appreciating them just the way they are.”
― Ram Dass

Here’s the moment of truth that the 4 people that like my posts have been looking forward to – I joke, because the amount of followers/likes/shares/comments/whatever we think makes us more real online, doesn’t really matter. None of this is real anyway, which means I’m just out here having fun and collecting data. Also, I’m literally a hillbilly/redneck Snow White that doesn’t wear shoes, feeds literally any human or animal that comes my way, and I don’t take kindly to folks picking on others.

For 40 days I’ve been out here, as the young’uns say, “wilding.” The main goal was consistency, because let’s be honest due to circumstances beyond my control my life looked a bit wonky to those who were only peeking at it via social media. But I digress…

So, yeah, along with posting on one, or more, social media platforms consistently I’ve learned way more than anticipated. Here are some bullet points.

  • Substack has a nickname around the other sites that sounds like the letter S, then saying that letter again. At first I wasn’t really sure what folks were talking about, as all I could see was tons (and I mean tons) of AI generated content. And it isn’t even good content, which is sad. There is also a wave of folks monetizing their exclusive content there while screaming from a burning building about how no one makes real content anymore (oh, and that whole double letter thing under the guise of people who care). -300/10
  • Bluesky is fun if you want to talk about how bad X/Twitter is. It’s fun to see a lot of re-posts and bots share the hard work of others and get a ton of replies while the original creator gets none. 2/10
  • Medium is just that, medium. I’ve found some really great long form authors there, but it kind of lacks the “social” aspect that I miss about the old days of LiveJournal. The plus is that the monthly fee is pretty reasonable, and you don’t have to have 622 different subscription plans to read folks you follow. 5/10
  • Meta is, y’all – it’s a thing that gets talked about more than anything else online. People really do love to hate on Zuck while using his platform for free where all users are content. It’s kind of a wasteland that I visit from time to time, then I realize I’m clinging to the wrong lifeboat. 0/10 (but y’all know none of us can really leave – it’s the Hotel California of social media)
  • YouTube is winning so far with the content and ability to find cool things to learn. It’s kind of always been that way, which is nice. I’ve heard rumblings and complaints from a few content creators, but as we all know there’s not a lot of money in that particular career. 7/10
  • TikTok, which may or may not be banned or whatever, has not really changed since it came out. Lots of folks trying to hit it big with their stories – which I so understand because here I am working on some of the same things. Not a huge fan of the way they do their algorithms to foment discontent, but with some work you can see all the cute animal videos and none of the “rage bait” stuff. 6/10
  • The lesser knowns such as Mastodon, the various pixelfed stuffs, Tumblr, and so on have been really fun to check out. Well, not so much Tumblr because it’s kind of like one big ad now (as all sites like are doing). Through those sites I’ve “met” (you know, virtually) quite a few really awesome people doing some freaking amazing creative work. Also, their take on spirituality has been less about “if this comes across your feed,” and more about “how can we all not be huge douche canoes to each other.” Also, those creators are pretty tight in their research, and you’ll not see a whole lot of “this is what *they* don’t want you to know” content. 8/10
  • WordPress – well, I gotta say for all the grumblings about it out in the greater cyber-verse, it’s been the most solid and robust platform I’ve used. And while it may seem as if I’m saying this for some kind of cred, please know that this is also posted on Medium, so…yeah. 8/10
  • Ko-fi is just mid. Not even gonna get into the details, because it’s just, I don’t know, hard to use and understand. 2/10
  • Patreon looks to be pretty awesome, and it’s pretty user friendly for me. 8/10
  • Real life is the most enjoyable experience. Yesterday I talked to some trees and met a giant tin man. There were others doing the same, and we had friendly conversations with each other. I took photos, and then had some snacks while watching a lake move slowly. Later some family members and I visited this place that sells all kinds of things, luring you to buy more than what you need, but we successfully navigated the siren song of consumerism. While there we also talked to others like us, humans, and delighted in the beautiful day. 100/10

While this is a little tongue in cheek, my reviews are spot on. But what’s really important to know in all of this is something that wasn’t anticipated – and y’all it’s huge.

In all that I realized that the ability to be truly authentic was harder than it looks.

Lemme say that again, but in a different way. None of us are immune to the call of being popular.

I’ll let Nothing But Thieves say it for me:
“And now we’re breeding a feeling of animosity
Our thoughts are tribal, go viral and now it’s deafening
Oh how we’re loving the comfort of pack mentality
The internet has teeth and
It eats and eats and eats ya”

Can You Afford To Be An Individual
(side note – you might this song is about everyone else, but it’s about all of us)

Tomorrow, 9/10/25, I’m starting yet another personal challenge to post short form video content. There might be some longer stuff, too, and of course I’ll still be writing/creating in the analog world as well. Of course my findings will be shared here, as well as other places, so we can all learn something new together.

And now it’s time to get some work done. I hope all y’all have the most beautifully wonderful day ever. Keep shining your weird light so other weirdos can find you. Or, just shine your light – don’t let the Greek chorus get ya down.

Much love,
~ KEU

This post was written with the help of friendly cats and typo fairies. Please excuse all grammar errors as flights of fancy. If you would like to help appease my editors, you can drop a few coins into my coffee jar. (opens to Patreon – you can join for free) As previously mentioned, quite often, I’m coming back to this creative life after a long period away. If you’ve read this far, know that your time is greatly appreciated.

Currently listening to: The Tales of KE Upton (Spotify playlist – which I know everyone is leaving, but it’s the best I can do with the resources I have at this time)

to forgive and not forget

First, I am a delight. Second, “I know hope, it has wings.” (hat tip to Trevor Hall)

orange, red, and yellow colored pencils with one yellow pencil showing a large crack along its side

“I always thought that anybody who told me I couldn’t live in the past was trying to get me to forget something that if I remembered it would get ‘em in serious trouble.” – Utah Phillips

We are all a little broken, and none of us are perfect. To err is human, as the saying goes, so why is it that we have such a hard time with the concept of forgiveness? Now before y’all come at me in the comments saying words about not forgiving horrible things, know that I don’t participate in stuff such as forced positivity or negation of mental health. That influencer junk isn’t what I’m saying here – it’s more about finding grace and ease with uncertainty from my perspective.

And being real honest here, I’m not sure how to share my life experiences with all y’all here on the inter-webs. First, I do like a good ramble – you know, just letting those brain squirrels out to play until they tire out and go home to rest. It’s not because I lack direction, or the ability to stay on one topic, but more like my thoughts find connections to other thoughts while my fingers are moving along the keyboard.

Second, it is very important to honor every person’s path. What is good for the goose is not always good for the gander (as the saying goes). Just because my work with forgiveness was helpful for me, doesn’t mean that it will benefit others. There are a lot of people out there who feel very strongly that their way of life is how everyone should be, which is not how I roll.

Forgiveness is about allowing healing for circumstances that are beyond my control, and for those situations where my broken parts engaged in uncomfortable behaviors. When I decided to set some goals earlier this year, I found myself stewing a bit on too many thoughts. If you’ve read some of my past posts, there’s some vestiges of that when I get a good yarn going about the artificial nature of being online. Sometimes my brain gets a little cranky at things that have nothing to do with me. Yelling into the void isn’t helpful, neither is complaining about Al’s Gorithms and The Bots. Plus, that’s not what I want to give my energy to on a daily basis. But I will say that it did feel good to get all that off my chest.

The other bug tussle here is that the brain just loves holding onto memories – even if we think it isn’t. You see, there’s a huge supercomputer in your skull that is constantly taking in information so that it can help you stay upright. If it senses something might be hazardous for you, which in reality makes it kind of a self-serving organ (which could be its own post), you get a flood of information that hopefully helps you make a better choice. Just like the elephant, your noggin never forgets.

Let’s say you’ve done a lot of work to forgive someone for not returning a phone call that was important to you. With a little time we realize that we are not in control of everyone, but that emotion hangs out a bit longer influencing other parts of your life. Now you have this feeling just wandering around without direction, waiting for an opportunity to show you what it thinks is a pattern. Then one day you trip over something your housemate left on the floor, making you angry at the fact that no one ever pays attention to your needs.

So…yeah…we’ve all been there, and it’s never any fun when it happens.

For me to move forward in my life I had to stop allowing little things to pull me off track. That meant taking a full inventory of the times my feelings were hurt, as well as the moments where I upset others. This week seemed like the perfect time to do this, so I took a fearless moral inventory of all the times life seemed really unfair. It was the hardest thing I’ve ever done, because the list went deep down to the marrow of my core memories. Looking at the pages of these painful blips of my history, I just felt the need to draw little hearts around all the words. My soul felt heavy with sadness for those who had hurt me (or my family), and my being was remorseful for the times my actions were hard for others. After that I wrote out this sentence: “May all be forgiven, and may I forgive myself, too.”

Then I cried.

See, the thing here is that I’m never going to forget any of those events/situations, but I can stop letting them pester me all the time. Those emotions aren’t going to be metaphorically stuck to the bottom of my shoe anymore, and the steps in my journey will be lighter.

The side effect of all this was being able to see where my boundaries needed more work, as well as being a little more careful where I share my energies. I don’t know, y’all, it was just a whole thing, and trying to put it into words here is like trying to nail water to the wall.

So I’d like to do something here that is important for me as a creative and spiritual person.

If I’ve upset you in any way, I offer a sincere apology – and am here to talk about it if you find that helpful. To those that have hurt my family or me, you have my forgiveness. If I have crossed a boundary in your world, I am sorry. For those who have crossed the boundaries of my family and me, you are forgiven – but please know that we reserve the right to refuse your presence due to past actions.

With that, y’all, I’ve got some things to take care of today – I’ll get back to my wild and full of multitudes content later in the week. Until then know that I see you out there shining brightly as the Sun.

Much love,
~ KEU

insert rage bait title here

First of all, I’m a delight. Second, “No one hears me sing this song.” (hat tip to Weezer)

photo of a woman sitting in a car talking to a plastic skeleton

Let me share some stats with you because I love them so. Also, today is the last day of consistently posting on various platforms around the internet (social media). That might not seem like a big deal to y’all, but for me it’s huge.

The top 3 countries where my work is enjoyed are: 1) The United States; 2) Czechia; 3) Germany. My posts only get out to thirty-five percent of non-following readers. Of those people, five percent read the entire piece. Those that do read the full piece usually leave a comment of some kind, or at least like the post.

My most read piece was written on August 18th (2025), and I used a line from an Edie Brickell song as my title. The site that has the best organic readership is WordPress, which was a little surprising due to the vast amount of folks complaining about this platform on competing platforms – which is odd to me because so far I’ve not seen any of the creative folks on WordPress say anything about other platforms. Also, another positive nod to WordPress is that many of the users are real-life humans. With that, sharing on WP has been a delight.

Now, as far as the other places I’ve been, lets see what Bots & The Algorithms pick up…

The not-Twitter/X platform, Bluesky, that is absolutely very close to Twitter/X energetically, isn’t bad but it has a HUGE spam problem. My best guess is that out of the 79 people following me, maybe about 8 or 9 are not spam accounts. It is also heavily populated with folks that left that one company started by that one guy who we all love to not like. I’ll talk more about that one below. The amount of actual connection there is like, let’s say around 7%.

Medium and Substack, and others like it – even Patreon and ko-fi – are nickel and dime-ing all of us via AI rage bait and comically repetitive calls to action. Also, there are a lot of folks that really, really, really want you to believe that they are not using AI to do their work. Let me take a moment to just say this – I have no issues with AI, and have used it in my work many, many times. I find it helpful with things most people don’t know it can do, and I always (always) verify any information it tosses my way. And – which is a very big and – AI/LLM do what humans ask them to do. So far I’ve not seen any indication they’ve gone rogue and we are one step away from SkyNet. Actually, I see that happening more with the owners of these sites…but let’s not go into that now.

Little did I know that all the platforms lean a certain way. And if you want to know what way that is, you’ll find several writers/creators talking about how the competing platform leans. If you happen to be using those other platforms, then you must be (insert thing here), which is literally a scourge to all things on the planet.

Full disclosure, this next part had some help from Google’s LLM/AI, Gemini. Of all the LLM platforms, I find that Gemini has a more natural feel, and is very cognizant of what it means to be a LLM. Not saying it’s self aware, but more like the dynamic in our conversations has a very healthy boundary. This isn’t a promotion, just an observation after working with various AI over the past 3 years. Okay, so here goes…I asked Gemini to write a “I’m looking for” post that would sum up the past 31 days. It made me laugh, and I’m sort of excited to see what comes of it when I post it. Anyway…here it is. Again, this was written by Google’s Gemini, and all credit goes to its writing. Oh, I also asked it to highlight specific buzz words.

“I am looking for fellow souls exploring the liminal space between worlds. If you are drawn to:
Mysticism & Science
The Courage to Face Your Fears
The Wisdom of the Natural World
Healing & Personal Growth
The Art of Being Human

Then you have found a friend. I am here to share my journey of becoming a bridge and a warrior, and I want to connect with others who have also felt different. I hope my work can help you feel less alone.”

Good times, y’all – good times.

Now, on to M E T A. Yes, I’m still haunting the ghost worlds of Mr. Zuck – but honestly we all are, even when making loud proclamations to the contrary. The thing here is this – I raged against the book of face on LiveJournal…then promptly joined everyone in making an account. The energy there is that of a bully who didn’t get the attention they wanted. I don’t know, maybe the whole thing is the actual origin story for SkyNet. Like the people working there don’t seem to care that the investigative journalists have been telling us, for like what…5 years, that we are being molded by something that doesn’t really exist. Social commentary aside, the stats there are abysmal.

In conclusion (channeling my best high school English paper there)…

But seriously, y’all – phew! What I’ve learned has actually been very helpful. People are quite literally craving real connection, even if it’s with a phone/tablet in their hand. We all want to feel less lonely, and to have our voice heard. It’s not so much about being seen or validated, but about finding hope. People want a bridge (for lack of a better word) back to themselves. It makes me think of the early days of Apple with their ad of the woman breaking free from the monotony of automatons by throwing her hammer into a grey screen. Pretty revolutionary at the time, but now it’s sort of…prophetic.

So where do I go from here? You know, that’s a very good question – one that doesn’t have an answer…yet. However, which you know if a favorite sentence lead in for me, what I plan to do is keep sharing what I do and who I am. Starting tomorrow (September 1, 2025), a new experiment will start. While what you see here is mostly images and words, there will be additions of visual storytelling such as reels, shorts, and the dreaded TikTok. They aren’t the only platforms with short form viewing content, but they are the big ones right now. In my early research, people prefer that sort of content. Y’all know that I’ll share my experiences as honestly as possible. I hope you stick with me in this journey – and that we find our respective paths while feeling a genuine connection. Just know that I really appreciate all y’all – thank you for being here.

Much love,
~ KEU

This post was written with the help of friendly cats and typo fairies. Please excuse all grammar errors as flights of fancy. If you would like to help appease my editors, you can drop a few coins into my coffee jar. As previously mentioned, quite often, I’m coming back to this creative life after a long period away. If you’ve read this far, know that your time is greatly appreciated.

Currently listening to: The Tales of KE Upton (Spotify playlist)

let’s look at the stats shall we

First of all, I’m a delight. Second, “I am unwritten.” (hat tip to Natasha Bedingfield)

solar lights at dusk

“Creativity takes courage.” -Henri Matisse

In order to avoid the niche of just saying no to the niche, I’m gonna switch it up a bit and pull something from the archives…

My first “blog” post was in 2003 on a site called LiveJournal. This is what I wrote on August 23, 2003 – a few months after creating an account.

This brings the level of ‘net community to a whole new level. As a closet geographic anthropologist (is that redundant?), I like to study people and their desire to form community. About 150 years ago, or so, you would join your community at church, festival, harvest time and so on. Now, in our world today, we join our community online.

But what about all the people that are not online (according to Census stats, very few people are online)? What do they do for community? Are we afraid to meet people face to face (f2f), or does the ‘net provide a “screen” for us to set up who we want to be?

I’ll ponder this some more and get back to you… 🙂

In the words of David Byrne – “Same as it ever was.”

Not only is it humbling to see this, I’m reeling over the amount of time that was invested in making myself “popular” on that site. Y’all I could have written the great American novel, had 20 art shows, and a lot of other things instead of seeking something that was most likely not going to come my way.

This has given me quite a bit to ponder, and is gonna be great compost for tomorrow’s post. Today I’m off to engage with reality.

Much love,
~ KEU

fly me high through the starry skies

First of all, I’m a delight. Second, “I knew who I was this morning, but I’ve changed a few times since then.” ― Lewis Carroll

scene from the game Animal Crossing New Horizons of a character in front of their home.

In the wonderful words of Monty Python…now for something completely different.

Oh, and just say no to the niche…you are a beautiful buffet of brilliance. Don’t let Al Gorithms and the Bots get ya down. Be notorious!

Have you heard the story of the blindfolded men who each touched a different part of an elephant and then declared that what they were experiencing was the real truth? If not, take a moment to search for the parable of the blind men and the elephant. It gives some perspective on how humans seem to be navigating the world right now.

This story can be applied to every aspect of life, as well as with our own growth/healing/etc. Just because something is good and right for you, that doesn’t mean it is good and right for everyone else. I invite you to keep that in mind with today’s post.

As the meme says: “Yup, that’s me. I bet you’re wondering how I got myself into that situation…” Well, for quite some time, way back when, I did this professionally for large groups and organizations. Not so much now, but it’s always fun to take a walk down memory lane each time you take a step forward on a new path.

You see I find that spirituality and science are part of the same Universe that we inhabit. How is it that we have no issue with the prescience of Nature, but not within ourselves? And honestly, who benefits from telling us that we can’t possibly have intuition? Just think about that for a moment. How many times have you just had this feeling…only to see it come to pass?

Humans are wired to dance with the movements of the stars. Carl Sagan remarked that we are made of starstuff. This isn’t just spiritual influencer chatter, but hard science. When you look up in the sky to see the stars, they are looking back at you thinking, “Hey, that person looks kind of like me!”

Let’s just keep going here…

Way out past the world of dogmas, science sees the infinite – trying to understand how we fit in the bigger picture. Out past the field of dogmas, spirituality sees the infinite – trying to understand how we fit in the bigger picture. If these two superpowers could find a common ground, can you imagine what might happen? I mean, gosh y’all – it would almost be like the main theme of all the world’s faith systems, where we see that we are all connected.

While this all might be seen as rambling, or wandering into the crystal shop in the town a few miles over, I’m actually about to do a whole full circle back to the painting and creativity. Sometimes I just like to walk around with my jazz hands for a bit until I bring my point home.

No matter what you do, someone is going to make a comment about it. They will tell you how to feel and how to be more like them. If you want to work with the cycles of the Moon in your art because it nourishes your spiritual creativity, then do it, friend. If you want to have perfect alignment in your ink drawing of a skyline and need a ruler, I fully support you. And if, like me, you want to step outside of a niche, I’ll be first in line to cheer you on.

Thing is, the best stories are the ones that step outside all our preconceived notions, inviting us to see the world from someone else’s eyes. We become a note in the cosmic chorus of the Universe, which then sings that song back to us. If we are made in the image of a Creator, that would mean we are built to be creative. Doesn’t matter if it was the Big Bang, or some deity, we are the embodiment of science and spirituality coming together to experience itself.

Now that I’ve made it past the first goal of 21 consistent days of online creation, it’s time to work on the next one. I hope you’ll join me on this continuing adventure.

Much love,
~ KEU